Bertha wants to know what is with Data Centers? Why do they need so many and what do they want to know? Do we really need more big brother spying on us? This is like a giant Karen with that bleach blonde hair, rude temperment, in drag, no sense of humor, no room for non maga, anti-everything beasts. Do we really need people knowing everything about us?
What kind of toilet paper do you use? I don’t know, what kind do you use? Do you wipe from the front or the back? I think that guy needs to be watched, yep, we saw him doing the single swipe. No, there was a double, we got nothing. I know we only saw a single. He folded the paper, did you see that, he folded the paper and then he blew his nose into it. Oh, this isn’t good, he blew his nose into it and then he wiped. Can we just move on, I don’t care if he is a wiper or a double blower, or a gold digger or a ..He is going for the trifecta. Humans this is what your tax dollars are getting used to find out. If you are not paranoid, you should be. How do they know what we do in the latrine? Where is the camera? I don’t see a camera; how did they get it in there?
Not since Hoover have, we had such a paranoid group of people wanting to know our personal habits. What do they need to see, can we watch them? Will they let us into their bathrooms, or bedrooms, and if so, what do they have to hide that we cannot? Do we need to see who really is in drag? Does the dog get swiped by the cat who refuses to let you near her? What if the cat is in drag, what might give him away? Is it the tail, I bet it’s the tail, you can never hide those well. Maybe they want to see how many people try to cook in the nude. Do you think people do it, and if they do, have they ever gotten things fried or grilled? We know they have been splattered by hot bacon grease. That had to hurt. Would you put bacon grease on the beast who burned you in the first place? No, it’s not the first place, it is up there, over there, behind there, on there. You can tell which are those people by the way they walk, they sort of walk with a pained look, and a cramped-up wiggle. Is it a wiggle or is it something else? Women can get by with it, men, not so much.
Bertha walks with a definite wiggle. Now does she cook in the nude too? She is winking. She will never tell. How about puppy, do we need to see him fondling produce? What about roughing the puppy? Yes, we know what we just said. There is a reason his produce has a surprised look on its face. His melons too. I am not sure if I want to see that, even though he makes a crudite platter for later. Thank God it isn’t sushi. We have reports that a raw fish is getting the once over by the wasabi. He seems to be in bed with the rice, and taking a bath with the cucumber. We are not sure if soy sauce is involved, we will keep you posted.
We know, all of those Karens need to be nosy. Karen your swastika is showing. Its showing Karen. It is ok for people to have dark hair and eyes, olive skin, be multilingual. Did they do anything to hurt you? Have you noticed them putting their turnips in with your kohlrabi? We know they are not kosher. They were not snipped by a rabbi. Has there been a shicksa getting it on with your Maga daughter again? What? Put your robe and hood away, it’s not Halloween. No wait, it is, ok, you have a few more hours left to wear it and THEN it must come off. Adjust for daylight savings time folks. This is going to get ugly. Karen thinks she is special. If she goes to get gas and there is a hold up, she has to get out of her car to see what the holdup is. The hose is not cooperating, we were not asking about your husband Karen, she is trying to get it shoved in there. Bertha is snarfing. She walks up to Karen, takes the hose in question and shoves it deep inside. How hard was that? Do we need to know how hard it was? No. Cameras are watching.
Data centers seem to be popping up all over. They already spy on you everywhere else. There is no privacy, it’s a myth. People cannot grocery shop without big brother spying on them. The carts spy on you, the ceilings spy on you, the checkout counter spies on you. You took one too many bags. That is theft, call swat, ice. It is a full-on crime. WE don’t care if you are clumsy, you grabbed something that you didn’t pay for. It is a bag, that is its purpose in life. It can’t do yoga, it does not shave, it is meant to hold things. Another Yenta trying to get home for the shabbas, and you are preventing her from bagging the pork. OK take her away but make sure she has plenty of Matzo.
Data centers are looking at you at work, when you drive. Did you give the finger, I think you did. Was it a cat driving? Yeah, don’t mess with that. Did you just make a U turn? I saw you make a U turn, with the middle finger extended. Oh, my aching loins. what you never saw a plotzing in the car? You sit in a car with no air, and you will come out looking like you sat in a schwitz too. Yeah bozo, keep staring, they are not going to pop out. But you might get mooned if you don’t’ behave. We have a winner.
Data centers are making people crazy. They are getting meaner, more paranoid. We have not seen this level of paranoia since they legalized pot. I think the plants are watching us. They are, they are heavy breathing. That isn’t your imagination, they are, it is called an oxygen tank. Pretty soon you will have an all-out weave war in the streets. What do you mean you were not staring at me? I saw you staring at me, I saw you staring at my dog. By the way that was my wife.
Oy people we need to all give them a real show. We need a full moon rising. Not a half-moon, or a crescent but a collective full moon. Bertha says only if she can flaunt them too. Let’s get our money’s worth. A full moon with a side of full frontal, and a shmear of waving the flag even if it is at half-mast. What can they do? Deport us? OK, send us all to Ireland. The Irish are saying oh dearie no. Give them to the British. The Brits are saying no, they are already full of palace shenanigans. See, we are already winning this war. It’s the war about nothing. No tax dollars can cover everything that happens in a day and its NUNNYA Business.
You know what, I think you are on to something. A data center about nothing.
Leave a Reply